6 signs you're too stressed.

According to this article there are six signs you are too stressed.
1. vomiting
2. hair loss
3. nosebleeds
4. memory loss
5. lowered immunity
6. excessive sweating

I think they are wrong, the six signs(in no particular order) are actually:
1. You're eating my food.
2. You're using my make up.
3. You're wearing my clothes.
4. You're running up my hot water bill, with long (hopefully relaxing) baths.
5. You're sleeping on my futon.
6. You're paying my rats vet bills.